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Baptist Seating, Parking Lot Style

Anyone who knows Southern Baptists or has ever been in a Southern Baptist Church, knows that Southern Baptists are serious about their seating. They have their pew and their seat. This is serious, and it is important. Do not mess with a Southern Baptist’s seat at church. Some of these people have sat in the same seat for 50 years, others 50 minutes, but they are darn serious about that ‘assigned’ seating.

Thursday morning Nathan drove Princess to school. He parked in the First row.
I never realized quite how deeply ingrained Southern Baptist Seating is in us… until Nathan calls me on his way to work to ream chastise laughingly chide me for not instructing him as to parking protocol. See, we (about 5 or 6 of my girlfriend’s and I) always park in the SECOND row with our cars in alternating directions in a line so that we can talk to each other from car to car. It never struck me that we did this. every. single. morning. Until Nathan called to tell me that he had gotten in trouble for not parking properly, and I was therefore also in trouble for not informing him of the proper protocol.
Oops. My Bad.

I’m telling you people, us Southerners,we’re a weird bunch. πŸ™‚

Thanks to the idiots incompetence the brilliant dunderheads at Time Warner our internet has been really spotty so I haven’t been able to log on for most of the last two days. The withdrawal symptoms are becoming really bad.
Tomorrow there will be pictures and stories: Think Cart to Floor Diving at Walmart and Jellyfish.

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  1. HAHA I see cops doing this all the time. I never figured moms dropping off kids would be doing this as well. Just the imagery is making me chuckle, like you’re all listening in on the mom scanners. “Unit 12, child needs assistance. Forgot his lunch. Please respond.”

  2. My BFF is nominal, and having heard the stories, I totally understand! Too funny. I hope you get your net back. We’re missing you!

  3. @BD: Dude, you keep me rolling πŸ™‚ LOL.
    @AFF: I miss y’all too! I’m about to defect to ClearWire or something. This is insane. Smooches love!

  4. Ha. That’s the same with a lot of the smaller churches around here, too. The bigger ones, though…not as much. cute that you guys have an arranged parking system that you didn’t even realize. Just proves that us moms are brilliant without even trying. lol

  5. very interesting…. i have never been to the south let alone a southern baptist church. will keep that in mind if i ever do visit!

    love your post!

  6. We’ve been having serious problems with our Road Runner too, ever since I got the wireless installed. They finally sent someone out to fix it after I said I wasn’t going to pay for something that wasn’t working.

  7. @Danielle: Be there in a jiff πŸ™‚
    @Amy: who else? πŸ™‚ No ER. I have an on call nurse as a good friend and their godmother πŸ™‚
    @mah-mee: HI
    @Ashley: Yep, here too πŸ™‚ LOL
    @Maria: They’re driving me bonkers GRR. Glad you got some satisfaction.

  8. LOL. Man, you are soooo spot-on about the Baptist pew assignments! LOL.

    And you have real live friends??? Not fair.

  9. I’m kinda with Court on this…you have real friends? Like IN REAL LIFE? Bah. Miss ya’ hun.

    I’m not so sure I’m ready for the diving episode yet. Can only imagine =)

  10. Funny. We too sit in the same pew every week. The one closest to the door… it is OURS. πŸ™‚

    Hope you get your net back.

  11. It’s not just a Baptist thing down here! The Methodist church I went to as a kid had “Visitor” signs on two pews to ensure that newcomers wouldn’t unwittingly take the seat of one of the matrons!
    Kudzu Queen

  12. Something more to have in common… I’m Southern Baptist! πŸ™‚

    And yes, I had “MY” seat at my home church. πŸ™‚

  13. That is just too hysterical! I’m not from the deep south, but I do understand the whole “church pew etiquette” concept. Our Baptist and Methodist congregations have been known nearly go to blows over “their” seat!

  14. I agree that it’s not just a Baptist thing – seating is serious business in our church too! Not at our current church but at previous church, a “gentleman” stood next “his” pew with his arms crossed because a visitor DARED to sit there! It was TOO funny!

    I didn’t realize that you got deleted from my reader – I have lots of catching up here!

  15. Lutherans do the same thing–the pastor even joked about it in a sermon (on visiter Sunday)–they must have felt welcome πŸ˜‰

  16. Hehehe – I love the way you write. You crack me up.

    I don’t know if you are interested, but I’d like to invite you to a new Sunday photo meme all about animal photos. The premier sign-in post is open now at Camera-Critters

  17. Heh. I love me some southern traditions! This is a good one to store away for when Sun starts school. πŸ˜‰

  18. I’ll never forget my first visit to a Souther Baptist church. There were actual name tags on the pews!

  19. Oh, no way. You are hilarious! But I think if I really look through my day, there are things like this that I do. I’m not so much Southern Baptist but more OCD. πŸ˜‰

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